Reflections of 2012

2012 has been kind. That's if I were to be extremely optimistic. Truth to be told, there were more down moments than up moments in my life in 2012. Family ties, relationship issues and struggles with studies just made the year barely bearable for me.

I said that this year has been kind because there wasn't any major hiccups in 2012 and I'm really grateful to wake up each morning, feeling alive. Only issues were emotional struggles, which I'm sure are nothing compared to others who had a tough year.

I'm really glad I managed to get pass all these moments, which made me a better, stronger and more forgiving person. I came to a realisation that sometimes, giving in little more than I intend to can actually solve the issues much better. Nothing is as important as the happiness of everyone. But this realization made me lose myself a little each time something happens.

So, 2013's resolution is to stay true to myself, but also be the best for everyone else. I'm definitely going to continue my little efforts of doing little actions to make someone's day.

Never underestimate how simple things like a sincere 'Thank You' and a genuine smile can make someone's day.
I'm just extremely glad the world didn't end in 2012 (I get more and more paranoid year by year as I get older. So paranoid I can't even.... That's why I'm such a negative person) and I have the whole of 2013 to make whatever I didn't do right in 2012, right. And I so need to complete The Secret to make me a better person.

Cheers to 2013 and I hope 2012 has been kind to you too!

Lots of love, CX

Hello!

Sorry I have been MIA-ing for a while here. Been really busy with Bf's birthday, BKK trip and Christmas! I'll definitely be back with a decent update on these events alright! :)

Here are some of the latest instagram pics I uploaded!

XOXO

The Script - Hall of Fame ft. will.i.am

Sends me the chill each time I listen to this.

I'm on instagram! ♡

Well if you're on my facebook, you would have already known I've changed my phone! And I'm currently using Note2 now yupp. Now that I have an android phone, how can I miss out on instagram?!!! (It's the only reason why I decided to leave my blackberry. I love everything about my bb).

So I've been really active on instagram heh. Not sure when the novelty will wear off but here are some pics I uploaded!

My username on instagram is chuxuantan. You can follow me if you want! :)

Happy Friday everyone! 

Greetings!

Poor quality photo but nonetheless, Monday is almost coming to an end!
Looking forward to the end of this week! 

Happy 21st Birthday To Me

Hello there,
I'm back! Previously mentioned that I would update about my 21st and here it is! I just cleared my end of semester exams which unfortunately I am not really confident about. Couldn't complete my revision for the last paper and screwed up for the second paper cause of panic attack. It's bad, just really bad. This semester had been exceptionally tiring and tough and I can only pray for the best now. Plans up next would be to get a part time job till school reopens.

On a lighter note, I'm officially 21! Had lots of fun and I sorta had 3 parties because I decided to split up my family and friends' party into 2 instead of one. I have a really huge family which I highly doubt my house can hold everyone if I merge the parties together. And definitely one just with my dearest boyfriend.
Below are some snippets of the blue themed party. It was such a rush preparing the set up, the food, the music and entertaining different guests. I didn't manage to spend time talking to all my friends :( But just by seeing all these people that are so important in my life, I'm really really glad.

My dearest MI clique. Love you all more and more as time passes! We've grown so much together and we get so attached to each other. Really thankful for you guys always being by my side when I need the most emotional support. Love love! :)

Nan Chiau back row people! Hahaha. I'm super thankful I found ya'll and you guys made my last 2 years in Nan Chiau easier. Thank you!

NYJC Clique. Glad that we've been consistently planning outings to make sure we keep in contact and don't lose track of each other's lives. Can't wait for our BKK trip and hope that we'll be celebrating Christmas together once again this year!

My dear Bimbards + Brian + Study buddies. Mad love ya'll. How can there be such a big group a girls and no bitchiness? Yes! They are all THAT sweet and nice. I'm so glad you girls are part of my life and   no matter what gathering it is, we just talk so much and I really love it. :) Really can't wait to see each and everyone enter the next phase of life and still be there for each other.

Get High! SO thankful you guys turned up. You guys are probably the most busy out of the group of people I invited so I'm really thankful ya'll made time down. You are the people that gives me inspiration to take up class to improve myself cause each and everyone of you is so talented! I've been missing out a lot about your lives a lot and really hope we'll catch up again!

Bf's family and his aunt who nicely booked this venue for me AND EVEN HELPED ME SET UP THE PLACE. Cannot.say.enough.how.paiseh.i.was.

My family and my aunt.

Last but not least, my dear. Thank you for everything.

Cheers to the end of the party!
Looking forward to my bf's 21st now!

Day 3 of the birthday celebration.

This special day was spent with my dearest and I never thought he would surprise me the way he did.

Can you see the amount of effort my dear took to draw this ridiculous image on my cake? Honestly, my artwork is not bad, but I don't think I can draw this pic out myself.

On a side note, I took part in Luxola's Face of Luxola Facebook competition and my votes are really pathetic :( cause I was really low profile about it but please do help vote for me alright? :)

Just search for Luxola's facebook page,
go to "Competition"
and "Vote for a Winner"!
My entry is C.X Tan!

Thanks in advance if you helped vote for me!
Just to share, if you're a beauty junkie like me, you'll love Luxola. I came across their page cause I was looking for Sleep Make Up for their Rose Gold blush (It's a dupe for Nars Orgasm & Benefit Coralista)
and they are super generous with their sampling and free delivery next day! Freaking awesome. Definitely worth checking out! :)

Its the weekend so go head out and enjoy everyone! :)

Weet Weet!

Decided to be back after the long hiatus! Privatized my blog initially over some personal reasons but  I felt that you know what, I shouldn't be affected by these little issues (which I'm not gonna mention) anymore, continue blogging and share my thoughts :D

Blog post on my birthday up soon (now that exams are over!)

Time

Sometimes I wonder if people ever grow up... even after so many years.

Emptiness

Here I am at home, sipping this awful luo han guo tea to bring down the heatiness in my body cause I'm on the verge of getting a sore throat. And lunch is a packet of biscuit sticks. And did I mention? I'm really all alone now. Bf out of town with his cousins, whole family's out (each have their own business to mind) and yup, I'm practically alone at home on a Saturday so I resorted to surfing FB the whole time from I'm awake till now.

I used to be so happy! And when I get older, I just start thinking more and more.

Relationship used to be so much more sweeter and simpler.
Health seemed better.
I used to be much thinner.
Times were happy.

Just feel like as I grow older, things start to affect me more. More anxiety attacks, longer emotional roller coaster and more worries about my back condition. Greater expectations on everyone and putting on pressure on myself to become a better person. Sigh. Nothing can make me truly happy now.

Why so emo? I don't know either. I just wanna be happy.

And so I dyed my hair

Yup! Bet ya figured it out from the post title. Finally had my hair done and I'm pretty happy about the results! So... I've been contemplating if I should cut and dye my hair for the past 6 months (considering that my hair is extremely long and that it'll cost a bomb and that I'm so poor, I procrastinated for REALLY long) and I finally did!

For the past 2 years (despite the long time I only did my hair twice. Haha) I've been going to Far East to get my hair done at I*con and each time I get my hair done there, I leave satisfied. But I can't afford to go back this time round cause the entire cut, dye and treatment will add up to a whopping $200. Meh. So I tried HairInn at Nex instead! Cut and Dye for $110! Almost half the price! SCORE!

Apologies for the poor quality and overexposed photos (and a awful looking me without make up)but that's the best my HP webcam can do :(


This time round I chose a brighter reddish brown cause I want to try something brighter at least once. I know it looks super safe but to me that's really light already. Haha and oh ya! I chopped my hair straight! No V, U or layers!


And here's the hair with more sun exposure!
Pretty happy with the results but I really have to work on maintaining the hair color since red fades super easily and that I have to go swimming often. Meh.

Been spending a lot recently despite having no money. Need.to.control.spendings!!! And I'm so desperate to sell my burnt orange crochet top from TTR cause it's too short. Any interested parties please let me know!!!!

I know everyone's busy and a lot of people are falling sick! So please do take care everyone :)
Have a great weekend all! (TGIF TOMORROW! YAY!)

Survived and Angsty

YAY! Ended the first week of the school with a breeze and I'm so proud of myself for swimming twice of my regular today! *throws a fist in the air* Pretty determined about losing weight huh. Not sure if the pasar malam directly below my place is gonna act as external factors that may hinder the process of achieving my goals. Meh.

Outing with my lovely MI people was so comforting cause I know everyone treats each other sincerely and treasures each other so freaking much. I can tell them anything, and I know they will never ever betray me and I can count on them to back me up.
So we went to Rochester Park for a late dinner and awesome desserts. Thanks to Sherman and Jasmine who made a random reservation and picked this restaurant which serves AMAZING food. We had pizzas, roasted chicken and wagyu beef burger and all tasted awesome.
Only downside was that we had to incur additional cost of sparking water before we start our meal. Not sure if we could opt not having it though.

Desserts at 1caramel and we had HTHTs and awesome desserts. Always love my outings with my MI Clique and I'm really sure all of us will be good friends till old age.


The lovely people whom I'm so glad entered my life.

.....And now the unhappy and whiny stuff kicks in.
Sometimes I really wonder how is it possible whereby people just like to depend on connections (whether or not you're close the the person) unabashedly and reap benefits out of people. For whatever reasons, to look and feel good in front of your friends, to make things easier for yourself....whatever. I mean, I would totally feel ashamed and awkward to do something like that but to begin with, I won't. I've seen so many people around me doing things like this and it just irks me, so much and each time someone does it, I just go haywire and start whining like a total b***h and the legendary black face of mine just appears. Sometimes I just hate my guts, which is largely or totally why I turn people off. It's a love-hate relationship.

On the hind side, I got my life back cause I recovered my Blackberry already! Yay to that and outing with boyfriend tomorrow though we have absolutely no plans on what to do. So have fun partying or just simply lazing at home (if you, like me have no plans) on a Friday night or strictly speaking, Saturday morning.
Btw, I'll try to take more pictures and post them up on the blog to make it more interesting! And I've been watching these $20 Make Up Challenge on Youtube and its so interesting!

XOXO people!

Determination

School has reopened earlier this Monday and I've got so many things unsettled. Payment for this semester, printing of notes and my work schedule. It just gets me panicking cause I don't know what to expect. Just need some time to sort out my planning and gain my momentum back.

So this semester I'm pretty determined to set down some ground rules to keep myself on track.

1) Lose 2-4 kg by end of this month
2) No (excessive) shopping
3) Swim 3 days a week for the good of my back
4) Be a better girlfriend

Sigh feeling heavy all of a sudden again. Feel like I'm an underachiever. Imma strive to be a better person. Anyway my blackberry is sent for servicing and will only be fixed in 10 days. Pretty hyped about meeting my MI lovelies tomorrow cause I can always find solace in them :)

Have a good night everyone! XOXO!

Just woke up from a dream and feeling my inferiority complex rising x1000000. Not a good feeling. 

Why so fat?

Why skin so bad?

Why so stupid?

Why so easily forgotten?

Why so... unimportant to anyone?

Whatsapp and FB notifications going on and on last night and woke up to them. But somehow I feel like I don't belong to any. Feel so...empty and heart's feeling all wrenched up now. NO! Hate this "I don't belong anywhere" feeling. Makes me just wanna stay at home and rot to prevent any awkwardness in meet ups. Sigh.

Desperately need to snap out of this dark pit and welcome positivity into my life. Meh.

Have a great day ahead everyone.

Reunion

I've decided to revive my blog! Cheers to that!

Anyway, Zhiyang is back to Singapore for just one day so it was a really rare chance to meet up and the day went really great. Been working for many days and haven't managed to loosen up so this gathering came at the right time. Everyone was late and we ended up having dinner at 8pm at RamenPlay (we couldn't decide where we should have our dinner cause everyone was so hungry we just wanted a place with no queue but we didn't want to compromise on lousy food either). So after dinner we went to Brotzeit to have some beer and headed to Butter after.

Was pretty grumpy about the clubbing session initially cause my feet hurts (chose the wrong pair of heels to wear and I had a total of 4 plasters on each feet) and I guess I just worn out after work. But glad I went. Crowd was meh but company was awesome, which therefore made the experience awesome. Took me a while to get excited and it took me quite some rounds as well. Yay cause the boys were so generous and each of them treated different drinks. I swear I drank too fast too much (I'm a pretty lousy drinker) so concuss midway through the night. For some reason time passed so slowly that night. Oh well. So we ended the night off by staying over a Poo's place! Teng, Zhiyang and I. Mac Brekky the next day and life doesn't get better than this! Waking up in the morning feeling so blissful just because I had a little taste of freedom and good friends were around. I REALLY seldom club, stay over and stuff like that cause I know my parents wouldn't like it and I pretty much want to do whatever I can to meet their expectations so yup, ended up missing a lot in life.

So here are some photos from FB and I'll most probably be doing up a cosmetics review post soon! Yay! Getting hyped. Have a great

day ahead!

Back Again

Not sure what got over me and I started browsing through my blog again. Missing the old times, the old me and also some things that I really wish I didn't chance upon. Really surprised that after such a long time this dead blog of mine do have some (and when I say some. I mean probably less than 10) readers visiting it occasionally and I'm really happy about that!

So, really not sure if I will have the time and if I would spend the effort reviving this blog. Life pretty much took a huge turn from how I was when i started out this blog and I'm really different now. My character, my life and practically everything. Been through pretty much and yup, guess those posts in the past doesn't really reflect who I am now, so I reverted those posts back to drafts and changed the template to a really basic one (not cause I like it but I simply don't have the skills to do up a pretty one. Lost contact with the lovely lady who always helped me with my blog template. Thanks for you help all these while!) and I guess if I were to start blogging again, it should breathe a new life! Maybe I'll turn this blog into place where I do my hauls and reviews on beauty products? (FREAKING LOVE BEAUTY PRODUCTS! I SWEAR I GO BROKE CAUSE OF THEM)

Shall take one step at a time and see how things goes!
Have a great day ahead everyone.

*You may wish to look me up at www.chiuchiuuu.tumblr.com (I occassionally blog there) or follow me on twitter @chiuchiuuu :D